TURN THAT RAGE INTO PASSION and then take that passion, slap it on the ass, spit in its mouth, and make it pay your rent. Channel every ounce of your unprocessed fury into something productive like starting a pyramid scheme, hate-fucking your ex’s new situationship, or screaming “I’M HEALED” while rawdogging life and also two strangers named Kyle. Use your anger as pre-workout. Cry in the gym mirror, bite a punching bag, then post a thirst trap captioned “growth.” Start a podcast no one asked for. Join a cult just to flirt with the leader. Carve “feelings are for cowards” into a bar of soap. Get matching tattoos with someone you met at court-ordered anger management. This isn’t healing—it’s performance rage with benefits.
Disclaimer:
By purchasing or using any product from Super Silly Company, you acknowledge that we are purveyors of absurd novelties, not your legal counsel, financial advisor, or that one cousin who claims to "know a guy." Super Silly Company, its employees, and the office gremlin who keeps stealing our pens shall not be held liable for any consequences arising from your use of our products, including but not limited to: sparking government surveillance, igniting barstool arguments, or causing your grandma to choke on her dentures. Our goods are designed for shits and giggles, not courtroom dramas, so don’t come knocking if your purchase lands you in hot water or a viral shitstorm. Proceed at your own risk, you delightfully unhinged customer.
